A paltry few words using the rhythm method to play Kate Me, Kissy Fit

The Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter:
Eskimo Pi

2000 pounds of Chinese soup equals

Won ton

1 millionth of a mouthwash equals
1 microscope

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement
equals 1 bananosecond

Weight an evangelist carries with God

1 billigram

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone
1 Rod Serling

Half of a large intestine
1 semicolon

1000 aches and pains
1 kilohertz

Basic unit of laryngitis
1 hoarsepower

Shortest distance between two jokes
A straight line

1 million bicycles
2 megacycles

2000 mockingbirds
two kilomockingbirds

10 cards
1 decacards

1 kilogram of falling figs
1 Fig Newton

10 rations

1 decoration

100 rations
1 C-ration

2 monograms
1 diagram

8 nickels
4 paradigms

100 Senators
Not 1 decision.