WSJ; Notable & Quotable: The Object Of His Affection Belongs In The House Of Correction

 I'm not sure who to blame. His mother, perhaps or the public school system. But it turns out that my son --days away from graduating from high school -- does not know how to send mail through the U.S. Postal System.

I am not making this up.

The boy has a smartphone, a tablet and a laptop, does some basic coding, is pretty good at computer-assisted design and gets excellent grades. He can bang out what appears to be 60 wpm using only his thumbs. But a letter? Forget about it -- he doesn't even know how to properly address an envelope.

The only reason I discovered this is because his mother and I told him it was appropriate -- highly profitable --to send graduation announcements to his grandparents, aunts and uncles.

I witnessed the entire confounding process.

First, he wrote the mailing address --on the type right of the envelope --and only the address, no name. I corrected him...I then handed him a stamp. This clearly baffled him. The notion of a physical stamp seemed like witchcraft .

"A stamp is required," I continued.

He placed it carefully in the top left corner of the envelope.

"That's not where it goes! Don't you know how to stamp an envelope? Mail an envelope? That's not how to mail a letter. I was beginning to lose patience.

We started again-- though I told him he owed me $.50 for the ruined stamp. This time...we carefully placed the stamp, level straight, on the top right, as I instructed.

"Now put the return address on the top left," I said. "Print clearly, please."

He stared back at me. "What's a return address?"